I love the sun, in the morning to talk to. embraced, warmly.

I love talking to the sun, feels like falling in love with extraterrestrial things has never been held before. surreal. With all of the rants outspokenly unconsciously either bitter or pleased. They listen to all of it. They were never biased, they loved bigger as their bodies were way much bigger.

I love the sun, in the afternoon to be felt.

I love talking to the sun, feeling like my own invisible friend to listening all of my suck love stories, without being judged.

I love the sun, in the afternoon to be my ears.

Eventually, the sun will leave me and be replaced with someone as bright as the sun, as bigger shaped like the sun, as warm their embrace like the king of the afternoon, addicting, tender, and exquisite creature

Eventually, my sun of mine is likewise the sun of sunset, with all of his ears to me, his big heart to me, his warm smile as the shine of sunset to diverge, and his unspeakably beautiful love to be felt.

Still. I love the sun, the sun of everyone who is way bigger than me, and the personification of the sun.

One year. Looks so short nonetheless people change so do hearts.

A year A day An hour

The article with the meaning of a day. a day of mine that wasn’t so full of someone I dreamed of at first yet one year changes you a lot baby, perhaps me too. Last year, I was someone who recklessly fell into others like it was my own bed. This year I fell for you, is it completely?

One year ago, I didn't meet you properly on your birthday. Nonetheless, this year changes me a lot, darling. this year, on your birthday I fall even knowing you much better completely and deeper than before.

One year changes you a lot, too. a year changes you into someone unpredictable, unspeakably amazing, and grazing that makes everyone's eyes keep on you, your every little something so-called charms. a year changes you to be a person so full of love,

One year changes me to be a person who loves you as much as I did to myself.

“Lo mau cari yang lain apa gabung bareng gue aja dulu, kak?” pria itu yang akrab dipanggil dengan nama satya memberikan tawaran pada perempuan disebelahnya dengan berbisik dikarenakan suasana yang cukup ramai malam itu. “Ga deh sat, gue duduk di deket bar ya, kayanya temen-temen gue juga ga semua yang dateng.” perempuan itu pergi menjauhi satya dan mendudukkan diri di dekat bar, segeranya dia memesan minuman untuk mengusir rasa bosannya dimana menunggu waktu pergantian tahun masih tersisa 1 setengah jam lagi. Bila ia tahu kalau teman-temannya tidak datang untuk menemaninya, mungkin dia bisa menolak ajakkan satya dan lebih memilih untuk beristirahat di kamarnya sembari menonton tumpukkan list film yang belum ia selesaikan, terbengkalai gara-gara UAS kemarin.

Jatuh dalam lamunannya selama 15 menit kemudian dia merasakan ada sebuah jas yang menyampir di bahunya mengkagetkannya, mendongkalah dia ke arah belakang sumber jas tersebut tersampir di pundaknya, “balik aja yuk? Gue kasian liat lo sendirian disini, diliatin om-om lagi, mau?” iya itu satya lagi. “Nanggung banget, abis ini juga tahun baru, sayang duit kali.” satya tertawa mendengar jawaban perempuan didepannya, “yaudah kak, check-in aja nih? Biar ga sayang duitnya?” baru perempuan itu mau menolak “gausah nolak, lo lupa ya ini hotel punya siapa?” jawab satya. Tanpa terlalu lama menunggu perempuan itu diam, satya menggandeng tangannya dan membawanya keluar dari aula yang cukup sesak saat itu.

Kamar 1020. Di depan pintu kamar mereka berdiri, sang perempuan melihat satya dengan pandangan ‘gue udah gila kali ya disini sama dia’ dan sedangkan satya mengambil key-card yang ia masukkan ke dalam kantong celananya, “yuk deh, gausa malu malu, kasurnya juga dua, terus biasanya juga lo tidur ga pake baj-” belum selesai dia berbicara sang perempuan melempar tasnya mengenai punggung satya, kemudian berlari menuju kamar mandi. Tepat saat itu, saat dimana perempuannya sudah selesai dari kamar mandi dan mendudukkan diri disebelah satya, yang menghadap ke arah balkon dengan jendela yang cukup besar serta tirai yang sudah disibakkan ke kanan kiri menunjukkan pemandangan malam yang cukup cerah hari itu, “kak, lo punya resolusi gak buat tahun depan?” tanya satya tiba-tiba, perempuan itu kaget, karena merupakan hal yang cukup aneh untuk memulai sebuah percakapan di suasana yang cukup canggung, “nggak banyak sih, cuma mau cepet-cepet lulus aja.” terdiam, keduanya, “kalo lo sat?” cukup lama satya nggak menjawab jatuh dalam lamunannya tetapi mendengar jelas pertanyaan tersebut. Hingga, ia menolehkan pandangannya kepada perempuan di sebelahnya…

11.56 p.m.

“Kayanya kalo gue juga nggak banyak, mau jadi pacarnya kakak boleh?” jawab satya yang cukup mengejutkan perempuan itu hingga tak bisa berkata kata selain membuka mulutnya sedikit. Perlahan tangan satya menggenggam tangan perempuan disebelahnya secara lembut hingga perempuan itu sendiri seperti tak menyadarinya.

11.59 p.m.

Satya mendekatkan posisi duduknya, dengan lembut ia menarik perempuan itu ke pangkuannya, sehingga sang perempuan tepat duduk di pahanya dan melingkarkan kedua tangannya di belakang lehernya secara lembut tanpa mereka berdua melepas pandang satu sama lain, mendekatlah wajah satya ke arah perempuan itu dan mulai mengecup bibirnya, “so, can I?” with his soft and tender eye gaze that girl ever seen from anyone who has been date her before,

00.00 a.m.

Without any longer waiting, she nodded and Satya started kissing her slowly and cupping her cheeks, devouring all of his tender love toward the red lips under his. Without any greediness, and lust at all, he just wants to show how much he loves her that night and forever. Tiba-tiba saja satya melepas ciumannya barusan kemudian menatap manik mata sang perempuan dan berkata “happy new year love, i love you today dan forever.”

and he starts kissing her again with all of sudden his hand stroking her thighs like it's tiptoeing, ticklish, while his right hands on her hips, the kiss start going sloppy as the girl so sudden moans his name with Satya start to lower the girl’s red dress strap in half of her arms and kiss her shoulder and cleavage gently with all smiley face appeared. She will be the luckiest girl tonight since he said,

“I’ll be gentle tonight, believe me.”

thin lips of yours never miss, the red lips of mine never wrong.

all the bones structured on your face, shaped perfectly as the god bless you so much, with his hands of Midas, he sprinkled all the glittery-gold made color and thing to you, one blissful thing that as ruby itself, was your lips. That’s never missed.

when the sapphire met a ruby. the crashed, damaged, destroyed was passed on our mind. nonetheless,

when the ruby met his sapphire, everything come so perfectly fit made, crushed each other, collided turn into the brightest stone everyone can admire, in the end, the ruby and sapphire dance together.

What's the first thing would you like to do, when your right eyes open slowly on one fine morning then the world is on the edge of doomsday?

The cliche isn’t it if that you said, ran, save the person I love yet, the fact selflessness hid all of humanity being of us, of me, and of you.

Maybe if one day the earth, and world weren’t our safe place for us to run, to live, to be loved we can just be known at least once a time, no matter what the time is.

It can be tomorrow It can be next month It can be next year

If you asked me, what if the world was colliding and no one, even us, could live on it? As I can answer, let’s just live no matter what the distance takes us apart, as long as I still know you here, there, I am really okay.

The world may be nearly over, someday or some days, we never know. Nonetheless, If I still love you till the world’s end, maybe this is the most hurtful thing I've ever done, without you knowing.

There. There are us back then, and right now. In the corner of a traditional coffee shop surrounded by smells of roasted coffee beans, full of passengers, fresh-baked bread that you always ramble every single day. Withholding hands as we did not want to be separated, with the camera on my neck, red scarf on yours.

And, you said; someday, our feet will stand here again as today. Not as a stranger, not as friends, but as one.

That your wishes that might and most likely would not happen, as I thought. Love is full of mystery, yet we always tend not to think about what that ‘mystery’ is in love itself.

I remembered that. I remembered that kiss we shared back then. With your big and warm hand cupping my cheeks, place your warm-red-thin lips on my cold-pink-thin lips. Everything turned so wonderful back then, that I was always skeptical about that.

But now,

My feet brought me back, so did yours.

At the same place, at the same time, at the same season. Despite being strangers back then, as friends, we are back as one.

Again, we shared the same kiss, the same lips yet with me here not being skeptical about what you would leave as you hold my little hand tightly.

Every day, day pass, time ticking, the wind blew, everything start passes beautifully yet I swallow the pain. Though, this is temporary Thought, this will pass shortly Thought, this will walk away

not. at all. without least.

I thought I was the armored knight with gold, the 24-carat gold which keep me safe on the battlefield, turns to be the sharp knife that start to kill me slowly

I thought standing all alone with gold, made me glow as ‘you’ are, all. wrong.

I thought the stronger one I thought the solid one everything starts blurry, even my eyes closed as well as the night started putting ‘their’ hands on my eyes.

“Menurut kamu bulan sebaik itu kah untuk menggantikan tugas sang matahari?” jawabnya dengan lembut.

“Ya nggak juga.”

“Sepertinya bila malam terjadi sepanjang masa, bikin nggak nyaman.”

‘Bohong. Apabila sepanjang hari adalah malam tentu aku akan menjadi orang yang paling bahagia.’ tentu ini kalimat ini hanya berputar dalam pikiranku tanpa berani mengucapkan secara lantang.

“Tapi, apabila benar malam akan terjadi sepanjang masa sepertinya akan terasa nyaman, aku suka malam.”

“Kenapa?” aku menoleh, menunggu jawabnya

“Semua orang di dunia tak akan pernah merasa lelah karena bisa bersama dengan keluarganya, malam merupakan waktu paling nyaman, selain itu aku senang menghabiskan malam seperti ini, melihat bintang dari balkon.”

“Bersama denganku?”

Ia terdiam, sepertinya memastikan bahwa dirinya tak salah dengar, kemudian mendongak ke atas langit gelap yang cukup cerah malam itu.

‘bodoh, kenapa tanya hal seperti itu’

“Bintang malam ini cari deh yang paling cerah, yang paling menarik semua mata.”

“Semua cerah, semua menarik mataku, bagiku semua bintang berbeda pendar cahayanya tetapi memiliki satu tujuan akhir, menyinari malam, tanpa pandang bulu entah itu mendung ataupun tidak.”

‘ini jawaban asal, mataku minus dan terlalu malas mengambil kacamata.’

“Aku setuju. Semua berbeda tetapi punya satu tujuan yang sama. Yang sepertinya sama seperti kita.”

‘gimana?’

Aku terdiam mendengar jawabnya tanpa berani melihat dirinya lama-lama, terlalu takut mendengar jawaban yang berputar di kepala.

“Dalam mencinta kita berbeda. Aku seperti ksatria penjaga dan kamu putri di dalam istana, seperti bulan yang memeluk bintang setiap malam, aku bulan kamu bintan, dan juga seperti matahari dan bulan diatas. Kita pada awalnya terpisah tetapi tetap berjalan bersama dan bersinar bersama. Tentu aku mencintai malam tenang seperti hari ini, di hari-hari sebelumnya pun tetap sama. Iya, denganmu, aku mencintai gelapnya malam meski tak ada benda langit yang bertaburan, meski awal hari mulanya sangatlah buruk.”

Aku terdiam cukup lama mendengar semua tutur kata yang ia sampaikan cukup panjang itu, benar posisi kami tidak berdekatan melainkan bersebelahan, terpisah antar balkon kamar kami masing-masing dengan posisi menyandar pada tembok, ia abu-abu diriku cream, diantara tembok tipis itu entah diriku saja yang mendengar degup jantung atau ia pun juga.

“Jadi, masih mau membuat diriku semakin mencintai malam?”

‘dasar bodoh’

“Kamu masih butuh jawaban seperti apa, Ken?”

Malam itu, dengan tiupan angin malam yang semakin dingin, bintang yang semakin bertambah untuk mewarnai langit malam, dan bulan mulai menunjukkan parasnya seperti tersenyum melihat kedua muda mudi yang sedang berusaha mengatur suasana malam itu menjadi semakin manis tanpa harus mendekat melainkan dengan senyum manis dan tawa tawa kecil yang terpatri serta terlontar pada mereka, dengan masing masing tak sabar menunggu ratusan malam lainnya tuk mereka jalani. Bersama, kali ini menjadi sang bulan dan bintang yang selalu memeluk satu sama lain.

Tetapi, apalah kita. Jauh dari kata ‘normal’ bukan berarti kita abnormal. melainkan ‘berbeda.’ bold, underline, size 20 font TMR.

Our first met was not in a good either bad but, we tasted each other lips it is like we’ve been meeting each other for a long time but, we just did small talk and suddenly you put your freshly maroon, not-so thin lips smelt like fresh apple to mine which smelt mint cigarette lingered.

Mengejutkan? sangat. Ingin mengulang kembali? she considered it. dengan ‘dia’ lagi? yes. it must be him.

It’s weird that his lips make everything strange.

Semua yang awalnya terasa tiada debaran kencang ketika melihatnya berbicara, kini berubah.

his lips are not shaped thin either or thick but, light the quenched firework; neither reddish nor pinkish but, its perks his own color and mingled utterly with mine; looks like found his perfect opponent; without any kind of lips product, his lips contained any kind of drugs that every move and taste still lingering on mine, it’s addictive.

his lips changed everything.

tentang diri ini yang selalu mempercayai bahwa awal dari suatu hal harus dilalui dengan hal kecil yang manis dan sedikit susah untuk dilupakan untuk menuju langkah selanjutnya yang lebih dari sebelumnya.

emerged as

something that you won’t forget since day one, that is, his voluptuous lips.